Monday, March 29, 2010

Mono heartbreak, or I Use My Blog to Whine and Complain

One day, I WILL go to the Holi Festival of Colors. In the meantime, the pictures of it that are flooding facebook right now bring tears to my eyes. I've been planning on going for over a YEAR. And then I got mono. =(

I HATE mono.

And have I ever mentioned my insomnia? Seems like mono would cure that, but noooooo. I STILL can't get to sleep at a decent hour, even when I WANT to. Here's the problem:

I have mono. It's the very end of the semester. There's a wedding to be planned, homework to be done, a house to be cleaned, and health to be regained. All of that makes me anxious. And anxiety keeps me from getting good sleep. When I don't get good sleep, I don't get better. When I don't get better, I'm anxious and can't sleep.

All of that =

Better get back to relaxation techniques. Or sleeping pills.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

There is a green hill far away

It's the end of March! That means April General Conference, which I love. It's all the joy and hope of Easter combined with all the awesome-ness of hearing from the prophets and apostles of God. I don't often wax religious on this blog (although I often wax spiritual), but I love General Conference. A few years ago, a friend shared with me a scripture study to do during the week leading up to Easter. For those who would like to join me in this study, I'm posting it here! Here are the teachings and events surrounding the Savior's life during the week leading up to His resurrection. There's also a study where you can read about the things that happened each day on the day they happened, but it means reading like 12 chapters one day and nothing another day. So I've divided this one up to where you're reading between 60-70 verses a day.

If you'd like the day-by-day real-time study, leave me a comment with your e-mail address and I'll send it your way!

Enjoy this week!


John 12:1-11
Mark 11:11
Luke 19:29-44
Mark 11:12-33
Matt 21:17
Mark 11:20-23, 27-33

Mark 12:18-37, 41-44
Matt 21: 28-32
Matt 22:1-22
Matt 23:1-39

Matt 24:1-51

Matt 25:1-34
Matt 26:14-16
John 12:20-50
Luke 22:37-38

Luke 22:7-58
John 13:2-38, John 14-17

Matt 26:36-56
John 18:12-14, 28-38
Luke 22:55-71

Luke 23:8-12
Matt 26:57-68
Matt 27:15-61
Matt 27:62-66

Mark 16:1-4
John 20:2-18, 26-29
John 21:1-24
Matt 28:2-7, 16-20
Luke 24:13-39
Acts 1:3-12

Thursday, March 25, 2010


#1. I am not good at resting when I have mono. Especially not when my sister is in town/when it's the end of the semester/when I'm planning a wedding. I'm working on this. Using mono as an excuse to "check out of school early" has its flaws. I should be doing homework or sleeping, but instead I'm blogging/wedding planning/movie watching/hanging out with my sister.

#2. My tonsil stone is GONE! Totally! It disintegrated with the drugs I was taking for everything else. Hopefully I won't ever get them again. Sad I didn't get to keep this one and name it, but wonderful that I didn't have to pay money to have a THIRD doctor take it out.

#3. Went wedding dress shopping today. Pretty excited about that. Although prom dress shopping with Mel yesterday developed within me a general distrust and dislike of formal wear shop employees. We found a super simple A-line dress for... $200. Woo hoo! It gives us a good template for all the other awesome lace/embroidery/whatever things I want to do to it. I think I'm going to get it. It's on hold for me right now.

#4. Only 3 and a half months till Jacob and I get married! We can't wait! (Well, we can and we will, but we're so excited to start our life together that we both wish it was RIGHT NOW.)

#5. I want to live in a tree house right now. By myself (Annie may stay) until Jacob and I get married, and then with Jacob. And not, like, a "treehouse," but like a full out house that happens to be in a tree. Can that be arranged, please? Thanks.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

"You can't dress trashy [or cute] 'till you spend a lot of money."

Kara, I think you'll like this post. =) Inspirations. (Those of you who don't know this Rexburg magician with cloth and a sewing machine, check her out...she's brilliant!) Mallosaurus, you'll dig it too, I suspect.

[NOTE TO READER: I have mono. I have tonsilitis. I'm in love. It's 3 o'clock in the morning. All of the above would count as individual excuses for poor grammar, non-sensical organization, misspellings, etc. The combination of all of them justifies any weirdness in the following entry.]

All of these recent health setbacks have led to a surge of "wedding nesting." One of my coping mechanisms for dealing with Jacob and I's seemingly "eternal" (pun intended) engagement is to "nest" for it. I don't know if "nesting" has a common equivalent for preparing for marriage, but what I've got is the wedding version of this:

Around the fifth month of pregnancy, the "nesting" instinct can set in. This is an uncontrollable urge to clean one's house brought on by a desire to prepare a nest for the new baby, to tie up loose ends of old projects and to organize your world. Females of the animal kingdom are all equipped with this same need. It is a primal instinct. Just as you see birds making their nests, mothers-to-be do exactly the same thing. The act of nesting puts you in control and gives a sense of accomplishment toward birth. You may become a homebody and want to retreat into the comfort of home and familiar company, like a brooding hen.
--Parenting Weekly Magazine

(In case anyone is paranoid, no I am not pregnant. I promise. Even if by some miraculous, immaculate accident I was, they would have told me at the hospital and not given me a million drugs.) ANYWAY. That's what I've got. Designing return address labels. Visualizing and planning crafts for the bathroom decor. Looking up flower arrangements. That sort of thing.

The great dilemma of late (and the main subject of this blog entry) is this:

What to wear for our engagement photo session? We've found a great, creative, and affordable photographer, and have some great inspirations, but we really need to wear clothes for these pictures. (As meaningful as it would be, something akin to Yoko and John's "Two Virgins" would be a little too much for everyone involved in this wedding.)

I've got to do a preliminary raid on Jacob's closet, first of all. That will give me some idea of what we have to work with. I don't picture identical denim on bales of hay or anything, but I do want us to sorta match. I just don't think we should BOTH go out and get completely new wardrobes. (Well, maybe...) My biggest difficulty is that even without raiding Jacob's closet, I keep looking online for cute engagement picture outfits, and I keep finding ADORABLE girl things, for WAY too much money. The existence of clothing companies like ModCloth, with their dear little dresses, is breaking my heart.

Like this darling number:

Scavenger Hunt Dress from ModCloth

I mean, LOOK at it! I even have the perfect little shoes and peasant top to go with it! Too bad it's A) $55, and B) sold out.

I'm also in love with this sweet and simple shirt dress:

Soda Fountain Dress in Ginger by ModCloth

Again, sold out. Again, $45.

Although, to be honest, I might buy 'em anyway. You only take engagement photos once, right? I'm getting a big tax return. We'll see how much of it I can spare after paying medical bills. Cute clothes like these deserve being paid for.

I mean, just LOOK at this vintage dress! I am ENAMORED of this dress:

Baba-blue dress by ModCloth, $100

It makes me want to go sailing, or learn shorthand.

And let's not even TALK about this. I can hardly HANDLE this:

Although I'm not crazy about the fabric, I am mad about the cut of this dress. I want this dress. I'll ride a bicycle to a park with a boy (Jacob) and have a picnic in this dress.

GIRLS ONLY (I mean that, Jacob. Tempting as it is, don't you dare. You'll see on July 10th. Or 11th. I apologize for torturing you with this post-script. I love you and will make up for it later.): Decided tonight that I'm buying my lingerie from Anthropologie. HOW DARLING. Just what I've been looking for, and right in my price range.

Next task: The wedding dress. That deserves a whole 'nother entry. We'll save that for my next episode of mono-induced insomnia (ironic as that is...)

Saturday, March 20, 2010

You take the Zithromax with Gatorade

I spent today in the hospital, because I woke up with my throat so swollen I could barely swallow. Jacob and his dad came over and gave me a wonderful blessing, and then off to the ER we went. They swabbed my throat (very unpleasant), then took my blood (even more unpleasant, because it involved my passing out, apparently having a convulsion and waking up to vomit), and then ran some tests. The diagnosis:

Acute tonsilitis
Exudative tonsilitis
Tonsillar stone
Infectious mononucleosis

That's right! The girl's got mono. With two and a half weeks left till the end of the semester. It should also be noted that I'm engaged. So I should say that Jacob and I have mono. Although he seems to be doing okay, and will just be careful. I got a note from the doctor about my condition, so that I can ask my teachers/employers to be lenient with me on my attendance. I'd hate to fail all my classes during the last two weeks of the school year. So hopefully they'll be merciful, and I'll finish the semester from my couch at home. So with a combination of sleep, fluids, Zithromax, Prednisone, and Percocett, I am on my way to health.

It's been a really difficult few weeks. But I'm so so so inexpressibly grateful for the love and support of those around me. Judy at work has been so understanding, friends have stopped by with help and kindness, and Jacob and his family have been especially wonderful. I'm so grateful for the love the Chapmans have for me. Jacob and his dad gave me a blessing this morning, and I am so grateful for their worthiness and righteousness.

I am most especially filled with gratitude for Jacob, my future husband. His worthiness, his willingness to serve, and his strength in adversity continually bless me almost beyond my ability to receive. He sat by my bed at the hospital for 3 hours, and stuck around even during those moments when he was terrified for my health and safety. The man helped me clean vomit from my chin today. He drove me to Walmart and pushed a wheelchair around the store. He offered me Priesthood blessings and joined me in my prayers. I am astounded at how good of a man he is, and I am so humbled and honored to have him in my life. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life and eternity with him. He blesses my life far beyond my own understanding, and I am filled with love and gratitude for him. Especially during times like this.

Friday, March 19, 2010

Shades of Oregon

I may have been born in Utah, and I may have been raised in California and lived in Idaho as well, but my heart blossoms in Oregon. I miss it lately.

liberal (adj.): open-minded or tolerant, esp. free of or not bound by traditional or conventional ideas, values, etc.

(PS I'm in love with this. "Mobile Om.")

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Maybe if I put a lime in a coconut? And drink that all up?

I know you're probably sick of hearing about it, but it's on MY mind (and my tonsil) and this is MY blog, so I'm going to keep writing about it.

Hopefully, this tonsilolith will work itself out on its own, but I have an appointment for this coming Tuesday to have it removed by more trained hands (Rexburg's local Ear/Nose/Throat doctor). Woo hoo.

Here's a list of remedies I've tried so far:
• Removal with a q-tip
• Removal with a dental pik
• Removal with a medicine dropper
• Gargling with salt water
• Gargling with soda
• Gargling with mouthwash
• Gargling with apple cider vinegar and water (sooper dooper gross, btw)
• Gargling with lemon juice and water
• Coughing
• Throat clearing
• Swallowing
• Making out

The latter attempted remedy was the most fun, but unfortunately proved ineffective. Oh, and also. I have all the ADDITIONAL symptoms of tonsilitis. Awesome. (Have I mentioned that there are three weeks left till the end of the semester? Good timing, immune system.)

Anyway, the purpose of this blog is less to reveal my failed attempt to rid myself of an uncomfortable malady, but more to share with you the soliloquy it inspired. I guess Macbeth is still on my mind, so I modified the famous "unsexing" words of that gentle lady of the house of Macbeth, to express MY feelings on this damned throat ache.

The voice itself is hoarse
That announces the fatal lodging of a stone
in my tonsilar crypt.
Come, you Ear/Nose/Throat doctors
that tend on mortal throats, dislodge it here.
And fill me from the sinus cavity to the esophagus top-full
of most desired relief! Make free my tonsils
Clear up the access and passage to their crypts
That no vexatious visitings of nature
shake my guttural freedom,
nor keep peace between the cause and the cure.
Come to my woman’s throat,
and take my calcareous gathering, you otolaryngologists,
Wherever in your Madison Plaza offices
you wait on tonsilar infirmities! Come, health insurance,
And present yourself as the surest form of payment,
That my small savings see not the wound the doctor makes,
nor home remedies peep through the blanket of the internet,
To cry “Hold, hold!”

Sunday, March 14, 2010

If you saw what I'm dealing with, you'd view my complaints as justified

Wanna see it? My tonsil stone? It's REALLY gross...

But aren't you just a little bit curious?

Isn't this like a car accident?

You're repulsed, but you can't look away?

I'm really not sure why I'm about to post this picture. Maybe to justify all the complaining I've done/am doing/will continue to do.

Yeah, that's why.

Honestly, though. MY THROAT HURTS SO BAD. Imagine having strep throat, right after swallowing a broken piece of a corn chip that scraped your throat, and then getting a popcorn kernel stuck right where the corn chip scraped. Add a visibly swollen lymph node in the right side of your neck, an earache in your right ear, and horrid, rancid, awful bad breath.

That's what I've got going on. Until I get to an Ear/Nose/Throat doctor as soon as possible this week. To have my tonsil stone removed. Most people who suffer from tonsil stones remove them on their own, using a water pik, gargling, a q-tip, or just time. But I've NEVER noticed them if I've ever had them before, and so this one just...snuck up on me. And my gag reflex is far too strong to apply any of the above methods. Believe me, I've tried. Not to mention, this one is "embedded."

****Alert: If you are queasy, do not scroll down. If you're curious and/or think it probably actually looks pretty cool (like I do, except for the fact that it hurts me), scroll down. It was terrifying when I first took a flashlight to my throat; I thought I had a rogue tooth growing out of my tonsil. But no, it was just a cluster of calcareous matter in my tonsilar crypt. If you wanna see what a "giant embedded tonsilolith" looks like, scroll down.****

That thing that looks like a tooth coming out of the roof of my mouth, on the right? My tonsilolith. Maybe I should name it.

Friday, March 12, 2010


Found the culprit for my recent chronic sore throat/bad breath.

I have a giant tonsil stone embedded in my right tonsil crypt.



Gargling with salt water. AWESOME.


Thursday, March 11, 2010

"Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle." --Ken Hakuta

I'm really excited for Carrie to read this blog entry.

Bargain-hunting may take a little more time, but it always seems to pays off, especially when planning a wedding. Wanna know why? Because every now and then you stumble into these AMAZING deals. My original plans have been modified.

WEDDING PAPER DIVAS (which is one of the cheapest online wedding announcement companies whose products don't look like they were picked up at the dollar store, and who I was originally going to order from):

325 Wedding Announcements with matching envelopes
50 Temple Sealing Invitations with matching envelopes
$595 (before shipping/tax)


250 Save-the-Date cards
140 Address labels
500 Wedding announcements with matching envelopes
50 Temple Sealing Invitations with matching envelopes
250 Thank You Cards with matching envelopes
2 Personalized Rubber Stamps
$407.86 (AFTER shipping/tax)

(Free address labels and business cards--our Save-the-Date cards--through online promotion = 25% off anything else on the website one day only. Did I take advantage? I most certainly did.)

I got more than twice the product for $200 less. OH and did I mention that I found someone super talented, artistic, and creative to do our engagement photos? For $50? AAAaannnnddd, I've been grabbing simple, elegant little vintage things to decorate our reception and our future home every time I stop by DI...including tea cups, elegant fabric, and candle votives. Three cheers for being a bargain-hunting bride!

Now if only I could find a discount on postage...

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

"Great happiness!"

Well, Macbeth has closed. Off comes the makeup, the music slowly dies, the stage is disassembled, and we all have 6 extra hours each night to fill with...something. Homework, perhaps? Here's a little homage to the experience, count-down style, and in no particular order.

10 Things we've "put in" during the Nightly Backstage Pre-Performance King Duncan/Banquo/2 Witches Hokey Pokey (when we run out of appendages, we get creative):
10. Beard point
9. Sword hilt
8. Water holder
7. Liver
6. Clavicles
5. Right lung ("shake it all about" = breathing in and out really fast)
4. Adam's apple
3. Ovaries
2. Tonsils ("shake it all about" = gargling noises)
1. "Bosom interests" (a line from the show, which in this context we just used to signify "bosom")

9 Favorite "backstage" (AKA onstage, before stage, after stage) traditions:
9. After prayer, putting hands in the center and saying a line from the show
8. Neil and Michael's race to get to the green room after curtain call
7. Brandon and Neil's wrestling matches
6. Kissing Jacob between scenes (we're engaged)
5. Wedding planning with Carrie in the green room
4. Jordan Tait's usually inappropriate mumbling during the melee
3. Scott's committed and enthusiastic "Hail! King of Scotland!" at the end of every show.
2. Janelle putting on my mic every night, which usually involved some variation of this conversation: Janelle -- "A witch!" Liz-- "Molest me!"
1. Smacking Jacob's butt at the end of the cauldron scene (and Joe's one night on accident)

8 Memorable Bloopers/Mishaps
8. "No more shall that Thane of Cawdor deceive our bosom...interests." (King Duncan)
7. Julie's trap not going down on closing night, without her jumping on it
6. Nancy's line adventures during the cauldron scene
5. Dropping the "all-seeing eye" and having it roll off the stage and into the audience
4. The night Julie couldn't quite pop the blood capsules in her mouth while kissing Caleb, so she sort of seemed to be chewing on his face.
3. Neil throwing his wooden sword off the stage in his vigor and enthusiasm as Macduff's son.
2. When the trap door didn't work and Brandon's head couldn't be retrieved.
1. The fire alarm going off

7 Favorite lines:
7. "Great happiness!"
6. PORTER: "Knock knock!"
AUDIENCE: "Who's there?"
PORTER: (with a disdainful look at audience) "I'm talking to the door now."
5. "Gentle lady of the hhoooouuuussseee!!!!"
4. "OOoohhhhhhh!!!" (Lady Macbeth's "out, damn'd spot" scene)
3. "What, will these hands ne'er be clean!?" Mostly because "hands" can be replaced with other things in every day situations...dishes, clothes, etc.
2. "Inverness!" (backstage mumbling that became more and more prevalent)
1. "Where gots thou that goose look?"

6 Things I'll Really Miss
6. Doing the cauldron scene
5. Watching the Porter scene
4. Finding fake blood on all my belongings
3. Connecting everything I hear to a line of Shakespeare (I'm still sort of doing this...)
2. Laughing at the things Neil and Maggie say
1. Hanging out with an awesome cast

5 People Who Deserve Accolades
5. Antonia Clifford, for her brilliant sound design
4. Lindsay Lopez, for her blood and gore expertise
3. Amelia Bahr, for her fight choreography, brilliant blocking, and general awesome assistance
2. Brother Ray, for figuring out and constructing non-hydraulic, non-electric trap doors
1. Roger Merrill, for heading this whole thing with brilliance

4 Things I Can Do Now That Macbeth Is Over
4. Sleep
3. Homework
2. Work
1. Wear make up and do my hair during the day

3 Things That Will Forever Remind Me of Macbeth
3. Blood
2. The Hokey Pokey
1. Yarn

2 Things I Did Every Night That I'm Glad I Don't Have to Do Every Night Anymore
2. Eat yarn from my wig.
1. Put on lots and lots of make-up. (How much? See here.)

1 Video clip that says it all:

You all rock my world. Thank you for a beautiful experience. See you at the cast party!

Monday, March 8, 2010


"Get in line in that processional,
Step into that small confessional,
There the guy who's got religion'll
Tell you if your sin's original."
--Tom Lehrer

I keep trying to write my 10 page research paper for English, but I keep looking at wedding dresses online instead. I simply cannot concentrate on Macbeth and gender studies. I am so sick of school.

I drank a can of soda today, after committing (again) to try to eat and drink healthy. Not that I'm worried about weight (although my stomach ain't what it used to be), but soda = death liquid and I am trying to treat my body with more respect.

I wore a scarf today not because it was cold or fashionable, but because I was hiding a "love-bite."

Friday, March 5, 2010

"To my embarrassment, I was born in bed with a lady." --Wilson Mizner

Here's a relatively new revelation: Bedding for anything but a twin size bed is absurdly expensive. Don't ask me why. But preparing to enter the world of "marital bedding" (that sounds so inappropriate), I don't want to pay $75 for a full bedding set, but I don't want to be sleeping in canvas. So I've been doing some online searches to find clearance deals. I was looking for something kind of like this, only not so...glossy? India-inspired, but not in-your-face brocade kind of thing.

But I kept getting distracted by horrendous things like this:

Or this:

I guess I shouldn't say "horrendous." It's just a matter of opinion. But I find much of this offensive to mine eyes, and would shame to sleep in a bed so be-decked. Or be-antlered.

And in honor of Jacob being from Texas (long live the Confederacy! Wait...I'm a Democrat...wait...?):

This one is my favorite of the ugly ones. This is sold under the moniker "Shark Frenzy." Doesn't it remind you of the 1990's?

And then there were super-cool things like this:

Or this! Sleep = fun.

And here's a gem for the geeky at heart. We don't have the cash for any of these super-awesome bedspreads, but they're awesome.

And check this one out! How rad is THAT? One day when Jacob and I are both rich from our public school salaries, we'll have awesome bedding like this to hip-i-fy our room:

But in the end, I found the perfect bedding for the perfect price not online, but in a store. Today while running errands, I decided to dash into Kmart for a pack of gum (it was needed desperately, and Kmart was RIGHT THERE). We'd been keeping our eyes peeled for something cheap that we'd like, but hadn't had much luck. Before I grabbed my desperately needed pack of gum, I decided to saunter through the bed and bath section, just to look around. And there on the clearance rack, for $30, including 2 fitted sheets, 2 flat sheets, 4 pillowcases, and one comforter, was this:

The picture doesn't do it much justice, but it's PERFECT. Soft and comfy, cheap, the right size, and the perfect pattern. I even have a lamp that matches it already! I bought it (without consulting my soon-to-be-husband), and brought it home. But when I showed it to him, he was just as excited as I was. We celebrated the find by opening the bag and wrapping ourselves in the comforter on the living room floor. I'm glad I stepped into that Kmart.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

"There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so." --Hamlet, Act II, Scene ii


I am sick of everything. I'm sick of the dirty snow outside...signifying neither winter nor spring but some awful, dingy season in between. I'm sick of school...of always having something that must be done and posted by 10 am the next morning, of not even being sure what just past before having to look at what's coming next. I'm sick of not having time...of having every minute of every day filled with to do lists. Even spending time with people I love is something that "needs to be done," enjoyable as it is. I'm even sick of wedding planning! I'd rather just be married. You may have noticed the countdown on the side-bar there...? That's because if I don't keep a firm focus on the light at the end of the tunnel, I shall sink down into its murky, tunnelly depths and drown.

The thing that's really exhausting is NOT classes or work or no free time or the weather. It's trying to have a good attitude all the time in spite of all of those things. THAT is what's so draining...that's what I feel I'm running out of energy for. That's why I take a moment to growl now and then, even though I feel I shouldn't.


If you you suffer from negative self-fulfilling prophecies, make a different prophesy.

If forces seem to be whispering that you're not good enough, listen to different forces.

And if you're burnt out, scrape off the burnt parts and find some jam.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

The Curse of the Scottish Play, or "Hell is murky!"

So Macbeth is going excellently well. We opened a third week of performances, and it was sold out in five hours. Just saying. Here are some of the reviews we've gotten so far:

Dear Theatre buddies . . .

Wow is all I can say! You and your students did a marvelous job with Macbeth!

Acting, stage, sound, lighting, costumes . . . all in perfect harmony with each other and with the old Bard of Avon himself. The old Globe could not have done it better!

This campus is blessed by having you and your talents here. I like to pretend that I am one of you.

Kelly Burgener, Associate Academic Vice President, BYU-Idaho

Woo hoo! The administration doesn't hate us! Also, here's another:


I've never liked to see a Skakespeare play before I saw MacBeth on campus. (Before this I was always thinking, "I should be enjoying this. After all, it's a classic. How many more acts are there to go?)

But " MacBeth" under your direction was amazing!

I liked the sword fighting!
I liked the witches stuffing the bodies of dead people down the hatch!
I liked the voices of the witches!
I liked the knock, knock joke segment!
I liked Macbeth changing throughout the play! I loved seeing him go mad.
I liked how much I disliked Lady Macbeth!
I liked how you let us see what MacBeth saw when Banquo appeared to him, and then, after intermission, showed us the same scene as the dinner guests saw it. What a great way to begin the intermission!
I liked it that I could actually understand what was being said. (The worse thing about a high school Shakespeare play is when the actors don't know what they're saying but they're so proud they managed to memorize the lines.)
The costumes were exceptionally believable.

In short, I have a greater appreciation of Shakespeare than ever before.

Thank you and everyone involved for what you have given us all!


Jack Weyland, LDS author and BYU-I faculty

It's so great--and a little unexpected--to be receiving so much praise for this show. It's such a great experience, and the show really is something special. And Wednesday night, for the benefit of those friends and family members unable to see the show, we filmed it! Although that makes us as actors nervous and consequently made us made up in little ways---losing a blood container onstage, speaking a line with an ill-placed pause after the word "bosom," Jacob's make-up wart falling off his forehead shortly after an entrance, forcing him to carry it around in his hand for the rest of the scene, etc. But we were excited to be doing another performance. Despite it taking up so much time, we're all in love with the experience, it seems.

The problems started with the fog machine.

We just ran out of CO2 a day or two ago, so we were using a brand new tank. The fog machine is used from the very beginning of the show, and there was a lot of fog there. But it usually calms down. And it did, for the most part.

Even though the combination of the unusually warm theatre and the slightly excessive use of fog caused one audience member to pass out during the first half of the show. That, and she had just given plasma. Or something. Either way, it was...distracting? Yeah, that's a good word for it. Distracting.

Shortly after intermission, we three weird sisters gathered onstage for the famous "Double double toil and trouble" scene, which involves a cauldron and a lot of fog. The actors who come out of the cauldron occasionally get a mouth/lungful of stage fog, which is mostly harmless, just irritating. Well, tonight, EVERYONE got a mouth/lungful. The fog just kept going.

And going.

And going.

And going.

There were at least 8 people crawling around underneath the stage, unplugging cords, adjusting knobs, and trying to get the fog machine to stop. But it was possessed by the spirit of the curse of Macbeth, and simply would not be stopped. That, and the fact that no one could even see their hand in front of their face down there.

And soon, no one could see a thing ONSTAGE either. At one point, David was about 10 feet away from me, and I COULDN'T SEE HIM. By the time everyone was exiting the stage for that scene, you couldn't see where the edges of the stage were, which was terrifying. But everyone made it off safely, and everyone who could got out from underneath the stage, and we opened every door of the theatre we could afford to open, in an attempt to "air us out" a bit.

So next scene of adventure...the murder of the Macduffs. It's still pretty foggy, but we proceed with the scene. Then, the moment that Lady Macduff is being stabbed in the stomach---


The fire alarm.


The fire alarm.

Unsure of how to proceed, the cast carries on with the scene. Kind of. The family is murdered among flashing lights and piercing sirens. Poor Carrie is onstage, recently murdered, when Gabe comes on, like he's supposed to, and whispers to her "What the hell are we going to do?!" Finally, Joe Bidwell seemingly appears out of the fog and announces to the audience that we're going to hold the show and evacuate.

Since we have to by law.

So the cast exits the side door, and the audience the other door, and we wait in the cold, frustrated but laughing hysterically. It had just snowed, but luckily, we're all in heavy wool Scottish costumes, so we were all right. FINALLY, the alarm is silent and we shuffle back into the building.

We're milling around the greenroom for a moment, waiting for instructions, when...


Back outside we go!

After a minute or two, it stops, so we start back inside, when...

BEEEEP!!! BEEEEP!!! BEEEEP!!! BEEEEP! get the idea. About 20 minutes of on again/off again alarm.

I could tell you about it in more detail, but this video captures it pretty perfectly:

But here's the cool thing. It was funny, and it was an adventure, but we weren't sure if we'd be able to finish the show, and if we could, how long it would take us to get back into the flow of it. In the back of all of our minds (and in the front of some of our minds) was the genuine worry for the rest of our performance. One of the cast members suggested a prayer. We gathered and knelt in the greenroom, and Seth asked that we be able to do a meaningful and powerful performance, and thanked the Lord for the opportunity we have to do this show in the first place.

And that prayer was answered. =)

The fog machine calmed down, the haze dissipated, the audience returned to the theatre, and we did the rest of the show, as if the "alarum bell" adventure had never happened.

To conclude this entry, I share one more letter of "accolades" from an audience member who was there the night of the fiasco:


Thanks for a great evening of theater and bringing Shakespeare to life. I was riveted throughout the production. I have seen many shows these past several years at BYU-Idaho.

For me, this was one of the highlights. The production was engaging from every perspective—the staging, the effects, the acting. It was such fun to see everything come together and to enjoy the remarkable talents of your students.

And what would Macbeth be without a bit of bad luck. The fire alarm helped to carry on the tradition . . . innocuously!

Best, Kip Hartvigsen, English Dept. Faculty

Despite the mishaps and supposed "bad luck" attached to Macbeth, it's still one of the most rewarding theatrical experiences of my life. And I'm so glad to be a part of this cast.

PS: We filmed again another night. Sans fire alarums.

Monday, March 1, 2010

I eat, sleep, and bleed Macbeth

We're beginning our third and final week of the run. I'm completely drained and desperate for time/sleep, but hopelessly enamored of the cast and show. The ultimate conundrum.

To illustrate the greatness of this cast, I share here a recent e-mail thread that made me laugh. Mention of "fire alarums" is a reference to a rather eventful night last week, which will be blogged about in the very near future. In the meantime, here's to you, cast of Macbeth! I love you all. And this is why:

NANCY: Is anyone available from 10:30 to 12:00 on Monday to serve as a model for latex makeup. I have cookies ....

JACOB: I could do it and I don't care who knows it!

DAVEY: i dont think jacob should be aloud to do it!! stop him!!

ADAM: aloud?

JACOB: I can do it without talking.

LIZ: Wasn't this today? I don't know if this discussion is even relevant anymore...

JORDAN: For some reason the fact that it isn't relevant gives me more desire to perpetuate it.

JULIE: .....Great happiness!

GARY: I didn’t volunteer, I’m wrinkly enough already

BRANDON: And I didn't volunteer because I thought Bro Benson would

AMELIA: I didn't volunteer because I am 1800 miles away and it is 63 degrees. Yes, I am rubbing it in.

ADAM: Oh Rexburg Miserable! When shalt thou see thy summer days again!?

KIMBALL: In August.... ;)

AMELIA: heh heh heh. Actually, it was 63 today and tonight the low will be 29. It is still chilly here.

JACOB: What, Amelia? What are you saying? We can't hear you over the clash of swords. You'll have to come back to Idaho and say that again. And then stay.

GARY: Over the clash of swords and fire alarums