Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Two Wolves


A man once told his son, "Within each of us, there are two wolves: one good and one evil. They are constantly battling, fighting to be the dominant one."

His son replied, "But, father. Which one wins?"

The man smiled at his son and answered, "That's easy. Whichever one you feed."

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Jules and Seve Come to Visit, or "Baby Simon Goes on a Roadtrip"

Here's the weekend in pictures. Our good friends Jules and Seve came to visit, and they brought their newest family member, sweet Simon.

Here he is, surprised by mortality, as usual.

Simon spent the weekend: 

Being cared for by Mom and Dad. (That's a syringe in Seve's mouth. In case you couldn't tell.)

Thinking deep thoughts with Jacob.

Meeting Uncle Jerry.

Being a tiny hipster.

Looking this concerned at least 80% of the time.

And occasionally looking downright terrified. (We can't get over this picture. For any readers who may be concerned about the cause of this face, it was poop. When you've only had a working digestive system for three weeks or so, poop can be pretty alarming.)


But most of the weekend was spent cuddling.

Or being cuddled, as the case may be. 

Is it obvious that I'm excited for us to have one of our own someday?
Because I'm pretty excited to be a mom someday.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

SCI 207 Homework

(UPDATE: Yeah, I totally turned this in. And got full credit. In fact, the teacher liked it so much that when he handed the assignments back, he had me read it out loud to the class. Ha ha!)

The Assignment:
Observe the rock in the Geology hallway display case. Record your observations, then come up with the rock's history based on your observations.

The Rock:

The Rock's History, according to me:
Once upon a time there was a very large and often hungry monster named Lithovore Jones. Lithovore Jones was what modern bloggers would now call a “foodie.” He loved eating more than he loved sunning his tail on rocks or singing hopscotch songs, and all monsters love these things a lot. His favorite foods were plants and seafood. The only problem was that Lithovore Jones always ate too fast.

After going out to dinner with other monsters one night, Lithovore Jones grimaced and said, “I love eating, but I always get a stomach ache afterwards!”

“Maybe if you didn’t eat so fast, Lithovore Jones,” his friends kindly hinted.

Lithovore Jones sighed. “But I just love food so much! I can’t get enough of it. Tonight’s clam-bake was delicious.”

His monster friends agreed. “The barnacle appetizers are superb at this restaurant,” one said. “Oh, and the oysters! Divine!” said another. “I’m a fan of the Unidentifiable Material Horseshoe Dessert myself,” said another. Everyone nodded their heads in agreement.

Lithovore Jones’ stomach gurgled, and he sighed again. “If only there was something I could do to aid digestion!”

Suddenly, another monster stepped out of the alley. She had a long mane of matted orange hair, and it was filled with shells and beads and bits of bone. She was carrying a small leather pouch.

“Pssst,” she said. “Hey Lithovore.”

“Me?” said Lithovore Jones.

“Yeah you, sonny. I’ve got something here to cure your ills!” The strange monster held out the leather pouch, and Lithovore Jones peered inside.

“It’s nothing but sand and pebbles!” he said.

“Eat it, and your gastrological ailments will be cured!”

The other monsters looked skeptical, but Lithovore Jones instinctively trusted the monster-witch, and he took the pouch and gulped down its contents. Readers may judge this move overhasty, but they must realize that Lithovore Jones’ stomach really hurt.

For a moment after swallowing the sand and pebbles, nothing happened. Then suddenly, Lithovore Jones felt his stomach lurching and churning. The clams and barnacles and the Unidentifiable Material Horseshoe Dessert were all being tossed around in his stomach like clothes in a dryer. Lithovore Jones felt slightly alarmed.

“Is this supposed to happen?” he asked the strange monster.

She laughed and said, “Yes! Yes! One moment more and the process will be complete!”

Lithovore Jones felt his stomach slowing down, down, down…until finally it stopped. Lithovore Jones belched once and a small stone fell from his mouth.

All the other monsters examined the stone with slightly disgusted fascination. The sand had mixed with Lithovore Jones’ stomach acids to create a sort of cement. And in the cement were all the clams and barnacles and the Unidentifiable Material Horseshoe Dessert. The pebbles churning around with the lump of digested shells had smoothed its edges, leaving it free of jagged edges.

For having just been belched forth from the innards of a large monster, it was a thing of beauty.

When the other monsters finally looked up from the stone, the strange monster-witch was gone. The monsters debated among themselves about what should be done with the shell-filled rock for a few minutes. Finally, Lithovore Jones picked up the stone and put it in his pocket.

“I know exactly what I’ll do with this,” he said, and walked away, thinking fondly of his dear friend Brother Tonks, who would be sure to find a use for the stone in his science courses at BYU-Idaho.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Brief Announcement/Thanks

Hey everyone.

Remember when I asked all of you to go vote for this guy to be a Cheapster?

Well, pat yourselves on the back, people, because he's 
TOTALLY A CHEAPSTER!!!

Thanks to YOUR votes, the man is IN! Like Flynn!
Thank you thank you thank you. All of you rock. More than you know. =)

Friday, October 7, 2011

It begins


This was yesterday. Today is more of the same. (Like, literally. More.)

I think the saddest part of this picture is the soaked and limp prayer flags. *Sigh*

To be honest, even though I spent all of yesterday blatantly denying the change of weather ("I reject your reality! What are you talking about? It's July!"), I'm actually okay. I'm choosing to be okay.

Here's my theory. Winter is hardest from January on. Because in those early autumn/winter months, there are awesome things to look forward to. My attitude about the weather tends to look like this:

September: "Yay! It's my birthday! And school starts! And it's totally still summer. I can wear sandals around campus and do my homework in the park. I love September."

October: "Meh, the weather's getting cold, but that's okay because it's HALLOWEEN! And the fall leaves ARE pretty...maybe I should just admit that this is pleasant instead of trying to be different from every other blogger ever..."

November: "Brrrr, it's getting cold. But that's okay because it's THANKSGIVING! I love pumpkin pie so much. And turkey. And family. And friends. And gratitude. And I don't mind the snow when I can stay inside for a few days, wearing my pajamas and watching movies with my family and friends and eating awesome things."

December: "Okay, now it's really cold. But that's okay because it's CHRISTMAS! And I love Christmas maybe even more than I love pumpkin pie. I love Christmas music and making gifts for people and the smell of pine needles and having like two weeks to watch movies and eat awesome things. And caroling! And celebrating the birth of the Savior. Christmas is so beautiful."

January: "Well, New Year's was fun. I'm cold."

February: "Valentine's Day? Too commercial. I celebrate love every DAY. Hallmark can't tell ME what to do. I'm cold."

March: "I'm German. Not Irish. I'm cold."

April: "I'm still cold. But I love General Conference." 

May: "I'm in Rexburg. And I'm still cold."

June: "At last! My heart leaps with sunshine!"

So I'm choosing to enjoy the weather. Instead of grumping about how fall is "the death of all living things." Because there IS something beautiful about it. I admit it, blogworld. The leaves are beautiful. The crisp air does make me feel alive. I love cuddling up inside my warm house and drinking hot chocolate.

But I won't start talking about boots and sweaters, because they may be nice to LOOK at, but as for me and my house, I prefer to be as nekkid as possible, as often as possible. (AND I'm not stupid...)

Or at least I prefer shorts and a t-shirt to boots and sweaters. Even if said boots and sweaters are adorable.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Reasons to love being an adult

#1. Driving. I mean, you get to do this as a teenager, so I guess it's not exclusively "grown up." but it still hasn't lost its thrill for me.

#2. Ice cream for dinner. If you want. Or two bowls of tortilla chips. Or a handful of Lindor milk chocolate truffles. Or cold cereal. You can even it it in the living room. On the couch, if you so choose. (I've eaten all of these for dinner. Within the last week. My body feels like CRAP.)

#3. Bedtime whenever the hell you want it to be. You want to go to bed at 9? You can. You want to go to bed at 2:30 in the morning? You can.

#4. You're always tall enough for roller coasters and public pools. (I guess I'm making a slightly discriminatory generalization here. The "average" adult is tall enough. There are exceptions. But the exceptions are still adults.)

#5. You can make out to Nirvana in the living room, and don't have to worry about your parents walking in. (Although when you have kids, you do have to worry about them.)

So maybe this list should be called "Reasons to love being a married adult without kids in college." Because as much as bills and responsibility and insurance sucks, and as "hard as marriage is," and as expensive as college feels (and is), there are definitely some pros to adulthood.

(Oh, and if you haven't done so already, go vote for Scott to be on Cheapster Hopefuls. You just have to click on this link and "like" his picture. You have until October 6th. Every time you don't click this link and could, Sarah Palin steps on a kitten.)

(image via Allie over at hyperboleandahalf. Go read her blog. Seriously. It will change your life. It changed mine. Her treatise on adulthood is way wittier than mine is.)