I have a friend whose parents were stoned when they named her. That's why she's called Veteran's Administration.

I had a rather surreal experience today. I thought I'd tell all of you about it here in this blog. Since it seems to be exploding with words as of late.
I'm kind of on a little insomnia kick right now, so I've been going to last two days on about 6 hours of sleep. Not as in per night...as in 6 hours total during the last 48. Oh wait, I did nap a little during our Apartment Spooning Party last night. Hence the picture. (From bottom layer to top, that's Jesse, me, Smash, Jen, and Kathleen. You can kind of see my haircut. Which is a little bit of a shame since I had a really weird hair day yesterday.)
Anyway, I was in training for my part-time job today, and I COULD NOT keep my eyes open. We were just watching a presentation, and I was barely awake. I knew how unproffessional it would be to fall asleep in the middle of training, not a good impression, so I was standing up in the back, and trying to shake myself into consciousness and stuff. I got to a point where I could actually physically only keep my eyes half-open. I didn't want the trainer to think I was as zonked out as I actually was, so sometimes I'd try and exert all my eye-opening energies to just one eye...the one closest to her, which in my mind made perfect sense at the time.
I finally had the brilliant idea of writing to keep myself awake. Doodling was too hard, but in my foggy mind at the time, it made sense to write something, because that takes more concentration. I had long ago given up hope of actually listening...trying to do that AND stay awake would have caused a collapse. So I started writing. Funny thing is I have no recollection of actually writing anything down. Apparently I did, though, because I found an entire sheet of paper later, in my groggy handwriting, and it said this: (Please note that in order to preserve the integrity of the original work, no corrections have been made. So whatever looks like a typo or misspelling is actually what I wrote)

"If ship to adress is pink, you must verify it by spelling it out fools. Stay awake. I am high with sleepy. Now I'm literally crosseyed with sleepyness. Look I can't spell. No acidity. Wee--I feel like I'm in l alaland, which I am But there's not some small drawf with a moustache that's green. Moo can someone fall asleep while sitting and wrighting fool? I just dreamt something in the 2 seconds I closed my eyes that Paul McCartney saw this and laughed and Jesse joined him. MUST STAY AWAKE. This is so not healthy. My body needs sweep I know screen. Who was jush talking and that's not to I was going to say. Sister King passed away recently. That will make President's day an extra special holiday. Stand up again, Real Slim Shady."

Wow. I think I might like to get high sometime, just to see what's left around afterwards.

On second thought, maybe sleep deprivation is all I really need. Not to mention the fact that sleep deprivation isn't against the Word of Wisdom. Wait a minute...