Funny words, part whatever

Before I share quotes, let's talk about this picture for a moment. Because it's currently one of my favorite things that I've ever come across. (I think something was grammatically incorrect in that sentence, but I can't put my finger on what...) I get a lot of blog pictures from a website called weheartit.com, and when I searched "laughter," this was one of the images that came up. And it's full of things that make it awesome.
1. Baby.
2. Camel.
3. The baby is laughing.
4. The camel is laughing.
5. Wind.
How could one go wrong with those elements? One can't.

Anyway, it occurred to me that it's been quite a while since I did a "Recent Quotebook Gems" post. Part of the problem is that I only live with 1 person now, so there aren't as many people around to say funny things, although Jacob carries his weight well in that department. Also, I've just gotten lazy about writing things down. But here are some favorites of the last few months:

"I murdered thousands of babies in my dream last night!" (pause) "Wait. That was supposed to be funny. But I said it wrong." --Liz

"I loved NPH's opening. And I really need to read 'The Normal Heart.' And Norbert Leo Butz has no bones." --Beckah, on the Tony Awards

"Isn't it wonderful to be fat, cousin Waldren?" --Jacob, in an improv game

Jordan: (to his 3-week-old daughter) "You're not old enough yet to appreciate my sense of humor.
Heather: I don't think she'll EVER be old enough for that...

"I guess it doesn't really have a part, does it? It's just...one eternal round." --Jordan Tollman, on Justin Beiber's hair

"His singing was like...a marshmallow on fire. You're like 'This could be awesome, because it's fiery.' But it's still just a marshmallow." --Jacob

"Hint of sodomy in his voice, wouldn't you say, Treacle?" --Jacob/Jordan, in "Godot" rehearsal

Jacob: I have to go to the bathroom!
Liz: You ALWAYS have to go to the bathroom!
Jacob: I have bad contraptions!

"We're theatre people. We're like minotaurs." --Seve

"These stupid babies are always LEARNING things!" --Jacob

Melissa: I know why Jacob's balding! We learned at school. He has too much testosterone. Testosterone causes hair loss.
Liz: Really? So if he takes estrogen, he'll keep his hair?
Melissa: Yeah. He'll also grow breasts.

(addressing his computer, in a low and threatening voice) "Turn on, laptop!" (pause) "If that is your real name..." --Jacob

Liz: What if your baby is so cute that you DIE?!
Carrie: I'm more afraid I'll eat it.

Jacob: (doing homework) Hmmm...subjective complement...
Liz: Subjective thank you.